Goodbye Germany

Panoramic view of the Bodensee, Konstanz

Before I came to Germany my expectations were not that high. I imagined I would make a clinical entry and an equally easy clinical exit. Focus on work, travel around a bit on the weekends, and indulge myself in the culinary delights of this part of the world. Period. It has been a year and half to the date since I first came here, and now that I am all set to leave, I can’t but help looking back to those early days and say, “You were so wrong!”

Unsurprisingly, the better part of the master plan was consigned to the rubbish bin. The weekend trips never really materialized, bar a few - one long weekend in Munich, one in Heidelberg, one spent camping at Belfort in France during FIMO, one too many in Zurich, an interesting one in Amsterdam, one in Ravensburg, a couple of day trips, a couple of hikes in the black forest and one little cycle ride around the Lake of Constance. Not bad, but I think I could’ve done more. If only. If only.

My friends tell me that I’ve seen only the “Disneyland” part of Germany, which is probably true, for Konstanz is a favorite tourist destination for many. The mesmerizing azure blue waters of the Bodensee can lure you into wasting sunny days at its banks, inviting you to take a dip in its pristine clear waters and stare at the Alps marking the boundary between heaven and earth. White in winter and dark bluish in summer. Why the hell did I ever work here? I will miss the view sorely.

The old quarters of Konstanz escaped the brutal Allied bombing raids of the second world war by keeping its lights on. The pilots confused it with a neighbouring Swiss town of Kreuzlingen, and so the homes from the 1300s survived here, while those in other German cities turned to rubble.

If I had a penny for every time someone asked me “What are the three things that come to your mind when you think of Germany”, I’d be a rich man. “Boris Becker, Schumacher and BMW” is I believe an unusual answer. The 2nd world war scarred not just the landscape of Germany, but continues to scar the German population. Yes. Even to this day. It is an emotion called guilt. On pavements you will find these little bronze cobblestones, with the names of people who lived on that street. The people who were sent to dreaded prison camps to meet a gruesome death. These recent installations are a symbolic gesture - a sober reminder of a gruesome past, for which the current generation is genuinely sorry. Even though it was (and is) in no way their fault.

Reminders of the past

Street protests in Stuttgart against German involvement in Afghanistan

The German language, I’ve been told, is a very exact language. It is supremely frustrating to learn. After months, you believe you have kind of sort of gotten a hang of it, and then bham, you are blown away with a new, until now unknown rule. And each rule of sentence construction is inevitably followed by a million exceptions to the same rule. Mark Twain found himself in the same conundrum about a 150 years ago, and wrote a comical account of his struggle with the language - “The Awful German language”. Still true. Still true today.

One of the low points in the life of an expatriate, is the feeling of loneliness. Far from home, family and friends, evenings can get melancholy and weekends utterly boring. Skype or Facebook offer but only a temporary escape from isolation. Been there, felt that, so I was expecting it, and totally not looking forward to it. However, in the course of these 18 months, I’ve seldom had those expected bouts of melancholy. I guess I got lucky, for I met some of the sweetest people I’ve known. They’ve taught me that there is more to Germany than fast cars, cuckoo clocks and good beer. I know I will miss them as much, if not more, as I have missed my friends from Bangalore. Thank you folks!

No matter how far we trudge along,
The world is small and our lives are long,
I know not, if again ever we will together break bread,
That hope alive in my heart, in this life I continue to tread.

Goodbye Germany

Lemon Icecream

Amul had this policy of one new flavour a week or something like that*, so you'd think you've tasted all the possible ice creams flavours by now huh? Ever tasted Lemon Ice cream? Not me. Heck I can't even remember ever seeing that falvour available at that Gellato place in Indranagar or Corner house or even Naturals**.

And it seems to the a common flavour, in the Vanilla bracket, in Germany. It is called Zitrone Eis i.e. (Lemon Ice cream). And what is my sample space huh? Oh well not that scientific, but I've been tracking the menu on the Eis Van for the past couple of weeks. Each day the Eis Man plays around with the menu, but Lemon, Strawberry and Vanilla don't change. So

1. a lot of people buy the three falvors i.e. it moves fast or
   
2. they make too much of it, and hence the sale price is low, but the profit margins are high or
   
3. old stock, never moves so he has a lot of it which he is trying to dump or
   
4. it is the personal favorite of the Eis man

And the Gellato shops which are all over the place. You know - that stumble and you'll find one saying - yeah that applies to these Gellato shops. Every second shop in the city seems to be selling icecream.

Even there I seem to find this Zitarone Eis staring down at me from the menu, and the it does look like it sells, so maybe the Eis Man is not an exception.

The taste is quite interesting - lemony, a bit bitter etc and I wonder why it doesn't sell in India? Maybe the focus group didn't like it or something, but in anycase hese Ice cream companies have denied us the Lime Ice for way too long! I even got the mandatory corny name for it - Thanda Sherbath, just in case Amul, Kwality walls, Arun Ice cream are listening ;)


*Unverified hearsay.
**All references to Bangalore

Lemon Icecream

Braille on drugs

Some time last month the common cold doing the rounds caught up with me and kept me company for the mandatory week. To aliviate my "suffering" I picked up some over the counter drugs from the local pharmacy (Apotheke in German).

The packaging for the drugs was rather unique, thanks to the braille inscription (see pic above) . Normally, I'd have thought, "Ah! how thoughtful of the pharma company, looking out for the visually challenged". But then, the inherent goodness of man invariably vaporizes the minute he starts looking at bottom lines and profit margins, so why the eff would a pharma company take a hit on the packaging to benefit a minuscule percentage of its customers?

The curiosity suitably piqued, I started searching the European Laws for an answer, and in no time the reason for this seemingly altruistic act was staring back at me - Directive 2004/27/EC of the European Parliament and of the Council of 31 March 2004. The relevant excerpt -

The name of the medicinal product, as referred to in Article 54, point (a) must also be expressed in Braille format on the packaging. The marketing authorisation holder shall ensure that the package information leaflet is made available on request from patients' organisations in formats appropriate for the blind and partially-sighted

Entire text of the directive is available here

This instance of the inherent goodness of man was a result of some wicked arm twisting by some kind soul(s) in the EU parliament! Long live the "inherent" goodness of man :)

Braille on drugs

We-Gay!

Woha! Now where did that come from huh? That's exactly what I thought. At first. Hmm...

But then, think about it - two guys; sharing an apartment; cooking food etc etc etc... hmm...

Well actually if you live in Germany it is sooo "we-gay". You see in Deutschland they call a flat sharing arrangement as Wohngemeinschaft. The popular abbreviation being - WG. Folks from the English speaking world would pronounce WG as Doubl-you-gee and be happy and dandy about it. But the German pronunciation is wee bit different. "W" is we and "G" is gay and "H" is haa. So, and so, WG is we-gay! Aren't we all so happy now ;)

And since I live in a WG it's such a We-gay situation! Yahahaha...

Disclaimer: They author is not a homophobe or heterophobe or any kinda ph(r)obe. The author does not personally know gay people, maybe this is why they don't tell him ;)
And no, he is not making fun of the German pronunciation. He is so glad Germans can pronounce his name the way it is supposed to be pronounced, he is just a full-of-himself-insensitive-f$@%^&*-b@$%^&#!!!

We-Gay!

Germany: Thinking like a traveler - part 1

Yesterday, for the first time in my life, I stepped onto European soil omitting the time I roamed around Frankfurt airport during transit a couple of years ago.
Tom Kelley from IDEO, in his lecture at Stanford titled "Young at Heart: How to Be an Innovator for Life" says in one section the one must - "Think Like a traveler". He says, when you travel you are in a state of hyper awareness, and you notice every small detail which is different from your "natural" habitat. And that is what I did, a little deliberately, and are my observations from my first evening in Germany:

1) Thoughtful design - On the S-Bhan on the ICE connection from the Frankfurt Airport to Stuttgart I noticed the following things. I think this train is equivalent of the Shatabi of the IR*.
a) Motion sickness bags prominently visible and available in good quantity.
b) Separate and private cabins for people traveling with kids - so cranky kids will disturb only their parents and not the other travelers
c) Ceiling mounted sensor driven automatic opening and closing of doors connecting bogies of the train.
d) Multiple escape routes in the event of an accident. Instructions in German, English, French and Spanish.
e) There is more leg room in the second class seating area.
f) People were busy all the while - I saw people reading at any given opportunity - novels, research papers, newspapers etc etc.
g) The rail was very smooth - no abrupt changes in speed, no jerks or sounds when the tracks are changed, and ya, never heard the engine hoot its horns
h) The seats were moulded plastic.

2) On the train from Stuttgart to Singen I observed
a) The train was not as good as the ICE train, but it did the job well. The flooring was like an ordinary IR train. But the seats were more spacious and were in a 2+2 configuration. Each seat had a head rest in the shape of an "L" i.e. if you slept while sitting, and if your head rolled to one side, then your head would rest on the shorter end of the "L". Why should only the window seat guys have all the fun :)
b) Each compartment had a dustbin - and again, the production quality was something I was impressed with. The gauge of metal used was thick, the pivot or hinge to close the lid was noiseless - and it was of a fair size, not too small and not too big.
c) Each station was announced over a speaker system.

On the train from Singen to Konstanz was like the Volvo bus in Bangalore. But they also had these collapsible seats, maybe they are not used in case the passenger load is too much - but then who would evict those already sitting?
They had a fire extinguisher stowed under one of the seats in a reachable, yet unobtrusive manner. Also they had these travel magazines hung all over the compartment. One corner of the magazine was tied to one end of a string and the other end was tied to a metal loop. Wonder if anyone uses it that way.

At the Konstanz station I had to cross platforms to head out of the station. There are no porters, so it is self help all the way. When you have three pieces of luggage that can become a problem. But not to worry - they have this conveyor belt which will transport your luggage down the stairs! The power of use cases!

Unfortunately there were no signs which indicated where I could get a taxi, but some people on the street were good enough to give me directions in english!



There were no problems at the immigration control lines either - but was stopped by the cops on two occasions. The first time, at the customs, I was singled out from the crowd - maybe because I looked different. But as soon as the cop saw the Indian passport he lost interest in me :) It also helped that he was looking at my Chinese Visa the same time. hahaha..

The second time, the cops were looking for someone on the train to Singen, and I made the mistake of getting up and heading to the exit just as they entered the compartment from the other end... hehe.. I was trying to check if the station was mine as they called out "Engen" and I was too sleepy to realize that. But then again, the two cops saw the Indian passport, and the visa and flight stickers and they lost interest. They even told me that Singen was the last stop on the line, so I could go back to sleep :)

* IR = Indian Railways

Germany: Thinking like a traveler - part 1